Thursday, February 16, 2006

It's because nobody likes you, Claire.

At one point, every blogger complains about cite traffic. I am going to do that now, but I promise it is just this once and I promise to never to it again. Are you ready? . . .

Last week I started to get a little worried about this whole blogging thing. I noticed that only one person consistently leaves comments, my good friend "E." No, it is not Elvis, but the awesome Elizabeth or Liz. So, I started to wonder, is anybody reading my blog? If they are, are they so unmoved they have nothing to say?

It did not help that I read two hilarious posts about blogging. The first, Top Ten Reasons Why Nobody Reads Your Blog, hit a little close to home. Personally, I think it may be reason number 1: I am not a hot woman posting naked pictures of myself. I'd say, "I'll fix that," but my grandfather is one of my few regular readers, and as he would say, "That is inappropriate."

Then I read the equally funny, Top Ten Blogger Lies. It's funny, because this list could easily be changed to "Top Ten Lies Academics Tell Themselves." I would be lying if I said I don't care if nobody reads my blog. If nobody reads it, then it is kind of like sitting in the middle of the forest and talking to yourself. Very creepy.

So, I installed a site meter. And I check it every day. And guess what. People do read my blog! Okay, so it is like the same 10 or 15 people every day, but I am down with that. So, I decided to use today's blog to give a shout-out to my "people."

Hi ya Liz! Hope you feel better and thanks for all of your comments.

Hi ya Grandpa! (Claire looks around the room and says): Everyone, the is Grandpa. Grandpa, this is everyone. Grandpa says: Yo! My grandpa lives in the land o' cheese, i.e. Wisconsin. He's awesome.

Hi ya Dad! My dad is a faithful reader and often send me emails to make sure that I am mentally stable. He is currently recovering from surgery and at home for the next few weeks. Let's send him some happy thoughts, shall we?

Hi ya Josh! I know you are reading. You are the only person I know in Bakersfield, CA. Say hi why don't cha?

Hi ya Jacob! How is my favorite chemical engineer? Wait . . . you are the only chemical engineer that I know. Jacob is THE ONLY PERSON WHO HAS VISITED ME IN GERMANY, and therefore he is better than everyone else.

Hi ya Chad! Chad is currently in the peace corps and teaching in English in Ukraine. I suppose the internet is his link to the outside world, but I bet he would prefer a hot shower. He is equally awesome.

Hi ya Eimear! The German and I really want to come visit. Do you have a guest room?

Hi ya Mareike! Wish I could see you again soon. I'll keep an eye on Jake Gyllenhaal for you.

Hi ya Nutty!! Your Christmas card is sitting on my desk with my "to do list." It was sweet. Thanks! I guess my resolutions have sort of fallen to the side.

Hi ya Carrie! Cannot wait for September. I am plotting evil things . . . ha, ha, ha.

There are a handful of other people that read the blog, but I don't know who they are. I sometimes think they got lost on their way to a much better blog, but stay because they are curious about what this crazy American is doing in Germany. I wonder the SAME THING EVERYDAY.

Anyway, I also thought to myself yesterday, "What do you want to accomplish with this blog, Claire?" Sure, everyone wants to be rich and famous, but I think I would settle for my friends and family keeping in touch. This blog is my way to vent to the universe and contemplate. It is better than yelling at the German every night. ("Yes it is!!" the German yells from the attic where he is hiding from me.) So if nobody reads, I suppose that is okay. But it would be nice if you would stop by more often and sometimes say hello. Then I won't feel so alone in the woods talking to myself. Are you having trouble leaving a comment? Send me an email and let me know.

I feel better now. I promise never to bring it up again. Are we still friends?


"The German" said...

Mhh Hallo Engel!
Ich glaube es war vieleicht wirklich mal an der Zeit die Lser aus der Reserve zu holen! ICh kann nur sagen, dass ich ein fleißiger Leser deines Blogs bin und ich immer wieder neue Sachen finde, die mich immer wieder zum Lachen bringen!Leider schreibe ich das hier nicht in Englisch, das soll aber nicht heißen, dass es niemand lesen soll (bin einfach zu faul)
Das einzige was ich dir sagen will ist, dass du bitte mit deinen Blogs weitermachen sollst, weil ich die Dinger sehr gerne lese!
So habe ich abends immer etwas Abwechslung und zumindest eine niveauvolle Unterhaltung, die ich mit meinen mir anvertrauten Schülern doch nur allzuselten führen darf!
ICh hoffe es machen sich ein paar mehr auf den Weg und schreiben Dir
Love! The German!

Anonymous said...

Oh, you think I'm cheezy. Is that it?? Does this blog thing keep you from responding to old fashioned e-mail? I do check in frequently, and if your language gets a bit rough, I can handle it, I wasn,t born yesterday-not even the day before, and I've been around the block a few times. If you decide on the nude pictures of yourself to gain comments, I could even handle that, I guess.

Love, Grandpa

Anonymous said...

Okay lets see if the 3rd time trying to post is really a charm.....

(best Sally Field) We like you. We really, really like you! In fact, your blog is one of 5 that I stalk daily. And you should be forewarned that I listed your blog as a good one over at my LJ. Thus, you may be descended upon. They can be scary but harmless, though they might enjoy the nude pics. Who knows?

Keep posting. It gives me something to read at work, err home I mean :snerk:

PS I think your grandfather should get his own blog. I liked his comment :-)

Dad said...

yes sweetie, I do read it once in a while. Sometimes I just forget

Mareike said...

Claire I love your blog because we share this cultural experience the other way around... Reading your blog keeps me also posted on the important political things in Europe when I am too lazy at night to read more than the headlines on Spiegel online. If you could add every now and then a few nude pictures of Jake Gyllenhaal - that would be the icing on the cake :)

Cheers, Mareike

mom said...

for the record i do read this from time to time....and as far as you being crazy, well that is a known fact to all who know and love you. keep up the good work
love mom
ps good looking naked guys would be a great addition to this blog!!!
love mom

Anonymous said...

Of course we have a guest room for you and the German, currently though I am preoccupied with trying to find us a guest room in Krakow!