Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Bathroom Blues

I said I would be back Monday - just not which Monday. I noticed that my blog stats / hits have decreased over the past two months. I am sure that has something to do with my . . . ahem . . . irregular posting.

Any Mom and Dad-squared came and went. We had a wonderful visit! First we went down to the Rheinland and visited Oberwesel and St. Goar. The Rheinland is great for two things: visit old, romantic looking castles and wine. We indulged ourselves in both.

Mom and Dad-squared loved it here so much they are thinking of moving to Germany. Hmm. It would be great to have family here, but I think they should take some German classes and stay for more than a week, and then they might have a better idea.

Unfortunately, my mother had a few . . . issues . . . with the bathrooms.

Picture if you will a sleepy, middle-aged woman with a headcold. She has just gotten off the plane, and after 10 hours of traveling only wants a bathroom. After navigating to the correct place in the Frankfurt airport (not an easy feat for those that know the airport), she turns around to flush. Only - she doesn't know how to flush. After 5 minutes of standing, bending, looking, and pushing, she finally gets the toilet to empty.

On our way to the Rheinland, the toilet adventures did not stop. At the first rest stop, we entered a little cafe / convience store. We (my mom and I) walked downstairs. We were confronted with a machine and turnstyle that appeared to require money. 50 cents. Mom just starred at me.

I pointed to the slot in the machine and she popped in her coin. A ticket popped out. Mom starred at me again. "What do I do now?"

"You got me! This is my first time here, too! I think you take the ticket and go through the turnstyle."

"Do I have to give it to the guy on the other side?"

There was a man standing on the other side of the turnstyle who was observing my mother and I. He appeared to be getting upset by the backed up bathroom traffic behind us. "Go! Go!" He shouted. Mom went first and I behind. After I was finished I headed upstairs to the men folk. A few minutes later mom appeared.

"They let men inside the woman's restroom!! There was a man wiping down the counter!"

"Mom, he was just cleaning up. It wasn't like he saw you in your nickers."

A few hours later, nature sounded its call again. Both my mom and I asked the German to pull over at the next rest area. A few minutes later, the German pulled into a rest area that only had one small building. I knew that it would not be good, but I encouraged my mom to go anyway. The German looked at me curiously and asked in German:

"Don't you have to go?"

"Umm. . . no, I think can wait."

As soon as the words left my mouth, my mother came racing back. "There is no way I am using that! It smells like a 3 week old port-a-potty!"

I snickered. "I guess the man wiping down the counter was not so bad after all."

1 comment:

J said...

If you went to Oberwesel and St Goar, then you literally went right by me. I hope you loved this region as much as I usually do. Despite the people, this region of Germany is probably one of the most beautiful in the entire country.