Thursday, January 04, 2007

The Things We Do For Love

Happy New Year. I know. I am late posting my Happy New Year. I will explain in a moment.

First, I want to dedicate this post to my friend Josh. I made only one resolution this year: I am not sending out a Christmas card to anyone who does not write back within a year (seriously, the postage costs are killing me). Also, I only had gotten 3 (3!) cards by Dec. 24. Wouldn't you know it, I got five more after New Year's.

Josh, a friend from grad school, is one of the few I managed to guilt with my German stamps. He sent a lovely letter about how he reads the blog (Hi!), but doesn't comment. Therefore, I am going to write this post and insert his comments for him.

[Scene: Josh and Claire sitting at the Mexican place not far from the Notre Dame campus in South Bend.]

Josh: So, what have you been up to lately?

Claire: Oh, not much. Christmas came and went and the German actually got me good gifts. However, one thing was NOT ON THE LIST.

Josh: That bastard. What was it? A hairless cat?

Claire: Um, no. Actually it was a gift certificate for 5 massages.

Josh: Hey, that is a good gift. You really do need to relax, you know.

Claire: Yes, you're right. I was actually kind of homesick at Christmas, but I went to the house anyway and painted and sanded and hung curtains.

Josh: You rock. You hate the house. I am proud of you.

Claire: Yes, but the house knows that I hate it. It made me sick.

Josh: A house cannot make you sick, Claire.

Claire: Dude, it totally did! Last Sunday (Dec. 29) I noticed a little cough. I slept all day Saturday and by Monday I could barely swallow and I have hardly slept in three days because of my "little cough." I am going to the doctor tomorrow. I think I have bronchitis.

Josh: That sucks. But the house did not do it.

Claire: Yes it did.

(Pause. Munching of chips and salsa.)

Claire: Did you see Notre Dame get thumped by LSU last night?

Josh: Yeah. I am sure you are sad that you missed it.

Claire: I didn't miss it. I watched it live on TV.

Josh: HOW? You live in Cloppenburg.

Claire: The German bought a satellite dish and some sort of chip card that allows us access to NASN, the North American Sports Network. He spent 8 hours trying to hook the thing up so that we could watch TV. As I am dying from my "little cough," I was awake at 3am. Sadly not even the game could put me to sleep.

Josh: That was nice of him. You have a good husband.

Claire: Oh, he didn't do it for me. I realized afterwards that he did it because he gets Arena and can watch soccer live on TV. Watching ND was really just guise for the German Bundesliga.

Josh: Ah! Smart man.

Claire: Unfortunately, I think that FOX may own the NASN. I want to stay as far away from Bill O'Reilly as possible.

Josh: Come on, Claire! Bill O'Reilly has some smart and funny things to say.

Claire: (starring in disbelief) How did we become friends?

Josh: Our mutual love of Ritter's Frozen Custard.

Claire and Josh (in unison): Ah, Ritter's.


PS: Josh doesn't actually advocate Bill O'Reilly in any manner. I am just hoping that it will finally prompt him to comment.


Lisa said...

Hi, I'm not Josh, but I wanted to drop in and see how you're doing. Those are some serious glasses, madame. Very cool. The house is beautiful. Everything seems to be coming right along. Glad to see it happenin' for you. :)h

Anonymous said...

For the record, as an Irishman, when Bill O'Reilly states he is Irish, please disregard. He is not Irish. That said, I think it is unfair to the US to describe him as American...what is he?

Anonymous said...

Ok, Claire, you goaded me into saying something. I can't stand Bill O'Reilly. Ritters.... That I miss.